Marshmallows
Why? Simply for the challenge.
You can buy marshmallows at the store. You can even buy pretty good marshmallows at the store. But there are some things a man has to do, and sometimes a man has to make homemade marshmallows. Michael Chu provided the recipe, and I have nothing much to add to it except the following notes.
First, this will give your standing mixer a workout. It took me way less than 8 minutes to fluff the marshmallows, and I stopped once could hear the mixer straining. It’s possible that our marshmallows didn’t fluff as much as possible, or that I somehow screwed something else up.
The marshmallow fluff, before it sets in the pan, is crazy delicious.
The thing you should know about the marshmallow fluff is that it is the stickiest substance in the known universe. Getting it out of the bowl and into the pan was a Herculean labor. By the end, our faces and hands were generously coated in a the sticky yet delicious goo. Rachel, actually, was wearing a pretty nice sweater and I could see the marshmallow’s insidious tentacles starting to creep towards it, so I sounded the alarm: “Quick, take off your sweater!” I expected nothing more than that she’d go change into a different shirt, but she was focused, laser-like, on subduing the marshmallow beast, so she simply whipped that thing off and dove right back into the bowl. That, my dear friends, is dedication. Now, if I were to share with you the uncensored picture that resulted, I have a feeling she’d drown me in a vat of marshmallow fluff, so I’ll simply link over to the tastefully obscured picture at her place.
We let the marshmallows chill out overnight in their pan, and then dropped the onto a cutting board that was liberally dusted with powdered sugar. I cut them into, more or less, squares with a pizza cutter, and then we dredged each piece in more powdered sugar. The kitchen looked like [insert name of celebrity rumored to be a coke head] had been through there.
How did they taste? Like marshmallows. They really tasted no different than marshmallows you might buy at the store, so I don’t know if that means that I succeeded beyond my wildest dreams, or that I wasted a weekend and a lot of sugar. Upon repeated tastings, however, I determined that the taste was a little sweeter and less artificial than, say, your generic Fluffy Puff marshmallows, and the texture was vastly superior. Can I refer to the texture of a marshmallow as silky? Who’s going to stop me?
Never ones to leave well enough alone, and scoffing at the idea that less is more, we dipped half of them in chocolate. Some got a full dousing, others got an artistic striping, and some got an additional squirt of white chocolate. Admit it, you wish you had this plate of marshmallows right now.
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I think silky is the perfect way to describe the texture, and that’s what sets them apart from the store marshmallows. Man, I really do wish I had that plate of marshmallows right now, here on my desk at work.
By the way, I like to keep you on your toes, babe. You never know when I might next toss my clothes aside. ;)
Bee-oo-tee-ful marshmallows! And very entertaining prep photos as well.
I have to agree about the texture and the flavor. I’ve been enjoying them IMMENSELY and have been trying to be good about not scarfing them all at once. The completely chocolate dipped ones have made very yummy snacks all by themselves. :)
Who cares about the taste? We all know that appearance is everything, and these are by far the most pulchritudinous marshmallows I’ve ever seen. Why, if Hildi Santo-Tomas on “Trading Spaces” got hold of these beauties, she would undoubtedly apply them decoratively to some fortunate family’s formal dining-room wall. (And it would be a huge improvement over the corrogated-cardboard-au-naturel and tar-and-feathers motifs I’ve seen her use for real.) Thanks for the amusing description of two truly dedicated artists at work.
I had a marshmallow in my hot chocolate at a chocolate cafe in San Francisco and let me tell you, it was waaaay better than the kind you get at the supermarket. I conclude you wasted your time.
[...] The main frustration is that I’m not finding time on my weekends to do fun stuff. Like cook marshmallows. Or dye yarn. Or toss a frisbee in the park with Mr. Martini. I’m one of those people who can’t relax and do something fun unless all of my chores are done. Because to me, there is nothing worse than finishing a fun thing, then spoiling the glow by having to… vacuum. Augh. [...]