So tonight, Jack Bauer gets pulled back in after showing a mental mortality none of us would have expected. Perhaps even weakness. I’m watching tonight with JR and Kate. It should be a lot easier to project my disdain with people who will have no choice but to appreciate it. Common courtesy dictates that they at least pretend to appreciate it.

10:00: 1 square mile in Valencia destroyed by the suitcase nuke.

-12,000 people died in the nuke, ~900 before that. That’s exactly why I’m not counting all the people that are killed by people other than Jack Bauer. The show doesn’t deal in absolutes!

-Buchannon didn’t say 4 more nukes were stolen. What he has is information that there are 4 other nukes out there, not that 4 others were stolen. How does Karen Hayes screw that up?

-All of the C.T.U. field teams are dead. Tough.

-In ‘24’ world, the President has a bunker with glass doors where cell phones still work. Aren’t bunkers made of several yards of poured concrete and steel? Bunker busting cell phones.

-Oh, Morris, you dog. Who wouldn’t want to help Chloe boot up packet routers? Not you!

-Look at that. Fayed and the terrorists just avoided hitting a little girl with their van. They’re terrorists, but they’re not animals.

-Fayed needs someone to reprogram the bombs in the next couple hours, how’s he going to find that person?

-That helicopter on the roof was a really brilliant post apocalyptic scene. The first time I’ve been impressed with ‘24’ this year.

10:09: This guy was just flying a helicopter around, and crash lands on a roof. Are roofs really strong enough to hold helicopters? I want to try this out.

-“Stay here,” says Jack Bauer to the guy he pulled out of an exploding helicopter. “Stay here, on the roof of this house. This house that you just crash landed on,” is what he meant.

-“Not after this.” Jack Bauer’s back, Fayed, watch out.

10:16: “If these guys want to live in the stone age, let’s put them there.” I’m pretty sure that’s a direct quote from a current neocon. I also think that while there may be neocons in the military, most of the major drivers to our current predicament are civilians. But way to go, ‘24’. The President and the neocons have started blaming the military (and not supporting the troops) so why shouldn’t ‘24’ throw the military under the bus, too?

-“The President is speaking.” See now the snake Tom Lennox is being a good character. Last week, he was a conniving spider, now he’s a Presidential loyalist.

-Buchannon and Assad meet. Do they shake? Nope! Wow, Buchannon is cold.

10:25: Something’s up, Chloe, Morris, and Milo (what a dumb name, they couldn’t come up with another one?) are a twitter.

-B-Window? What’s a B-Window? I want this new technology of which they speak.

-Jack Bauer has a father? Enter stage right, Mr. Cromwell, you’ll be standing right over here.

10:27: Jack Bauer hasn’t spoken to Jack Bauer’s father in 9 years? Even after his wife died? Cold.

-What’s the story with this FBI agent? I think ‘24’ wants us to think something is up with him, which makes me think nothing else is up. Damn you, ‘24’.

-This is another pretty good scene. They’re going to bug him some how. Why didn’t they do stuff like this last week.

-“Ms. Palmer, I advised you to leave, but if you want to stay, keep your comments to yourself.”

-Jack Bauer’s father…Brother!?!?…left yesterday? That’s suspicious. Jack Bauer has a brother? And a father who has a servant? And there is surveillance on the father’s house?

-WOAH

-JACK BAUER’S BROTHER IS THE BAD GUY FROM LAST YEAR.

-‘24’ has officially crossed over into Melrose Place territory and I’m unhappy about it.

-My friend Jon alerts to me the fact that he has put ‘24’ on warning. They have 2-4 weeks to prove that this storyline works before giving up on them. I’m not sure I’m too far behind Jon. Except, don’t worry, I’ll be blogging all season, I just might find it more difficult to suspend my disbelief.

-This is a lot to go over in a commercial… Mind blowing, wow.

10:38:Good fake surprise, Graham Bauer.

-So it was relatively common knowledge that Jack Bauer was in China? Didn’t they all think he was dead before he got kidnapped to China? Or did after he get kidnapped by China, did they publicize his kidnapping? Amber alert, milk cartons?

-How did Jack Bauer get a car? Wasn’t he being driven by a C.T.U. agent?

-JR and Kate recognize Graham Bauer’s wife as the woman from Heroes, Ed, and General Hospital. They’re good like that.

-Graham Bauer’s wife has a soft spot for Jack Bauer, which may be the cause for 2 of the worst days in Jack Bauer’s life, not to mention 20 months in a Chinese torture prison/salon. The brother/puppetmaster as jealous brother acting out to get attention? At least he’s as short as Jack Bauer.

-Tom Lennox is embracing the politics of fear. Tom Lennox is in favor of fear if it leads to his ends.

-Wouldn’t any underground electrical engineer guy, with the ability to do what they need done with the nuke’s know that any work they would be doing would be on other nukes? I guess they’re paying THAT much.

-I think this guy’s going to let his annoying girlfriend out at some point..

-Fayed just said that the bomb’s will go off today as scheduled. So were they always planning on having all of the bombs go off in California or in someplace within driving distance of LA? That doesn’t seem like the most logical way for terrorists to wield terror. But maybe that’s what they were going for. You’ll never know when the next couple bombs are going off?

10:49: Buchannon maybe be a cool cucumber, but he’s a man of honor and understands Assad’s mission. They will be friends forever.

10:50: Heydar is right. Don’t trust Walid, he is a tool of the infidels.

-“You remember that and you’ll be fine.” This was another example of leverage being switched around. The FBI agent was like “You’re only here because you’re the President’s sister”. And Sandra was like, “Don’t forget it.” She doesn’t back down from anyone.

-Walid is a pro. “IAA, I’m regional director.”

-Walid is in!

10:53: I think Jack Bauer is about to torture his brother.

-Nice hug, Graham.

-Josh Bauer, meet your uncle, Jack Bauer.

-Jack Bauer’s eyes say so much, Marilyn’s eyes say so much more. Hurt, betrayal, hot smoldering passion and lust.

-So is the name Gray or Graham? He’s too new of a character to keep changing his name back and forth.

10:56:

-“Relax a little.” Oh Graham, you know not of what you speak. Jack Bauer tortures people to relax. Got it?

-“Don’t raise your voice, or I will rip your tongue out, are we clear? People are dying…If you know something, tell me, or I’ll hurt you.” “You’re hurting me now.” “Trust me I’m not.” I wish that was my cell phone ringer or something.

-Torture Scene: 3. (Graham Bauer by Jack Bauer).

-Wow, Wayne Palmer is a terrible TV speech reader. Maybe this is what President’s normally sound like.

So, where are we? The Keysar Soze character from last year ends up being Jack Bauer’s brother. I’m expecting Bill Buchannon to take off his wig in the bathroom showing a lobotomy scar explaining why he is slowly going crazy over the course of the day. I’m not really into it. I just watched Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip and I kind of wish that I was blogging that instead. I truly enjoy that show, while I watch 24 because I enjoy blogging about it. Oh well.