Unlikely Words

A couple weeks ago, Matt reviewed Vosges Haute Chocolat Mo’s Bacon Bar. I had seen these bars a couple days earlier, and Matt’s generally favorable review pushed me over the edge. I had to try it. I felt differently about the bar starting with the cost and ending with the amount of bacon. A $7 candy bar should taste like a Josh Beckett playoff performance in your mouth. It should taste like angels’ harp music. It should taste like falling in love with kittens. The bar was good, but there were no kittens playing harps in my mouth, that’s for sure. Also, a bacon candy bar should have bacon in it, not diva ass baco bits. I was disappointed, but also strangely invigorated. The idea of bacon and chocolate is a great one, it just wasn’t executed correctly. I’m not the type of person who generally thinks I can do everything better than everyone (well, I guess I am), but I definitely knew I could make a better chocolate covered bacon treat.

After a few weeks of pondering, I came up with a plan. Today, I cooked a pound of bacon a little longer than normal so it would be especially crispy. I then crumbled it into a brownie pan and put it in the fridge. Then I melted about a pound and a half of semi-sweet chocolate chips. I then poured the melted chocolate over the crumbled bacon and spread it evenly with a spatula. I threw the brownie pan into the fridge for about an hour until the chocolate had completely hardened.

It was then ready to serve and it was delicious. I’ve discovered Jesus’ candy. Chocolate covered bacon. Bacolate. Believe.