Stupid zombie, you should have just applied to ZombieHarmony first.



Inspired by this Barstool Sports post and this tweet with graphical assistance from Shawn.

What a shitty movie. The previews suggested it would be a quirky love story when really they ought to have portrayed it as a bizarre, crappy, wannabe cult, career ruining, paycheck. I guess I was wrong about Reese Witherspoon after Walk the Line and Christina Ricci, you should be ashamed of yourself.

Some folks went after Peter Gammons last week for softballing A-Rod some questions during his first interview after it was revealed he had taken performance enhancing drugs.

In a note from the ESPN ombudsman Gammon says Rodriguez spilled more than was expected and at that point, Gammons wanted to keep him talking.

Gammons told me, as well as other interviewers, that he was stunned by Rodriguez's admission that he had taken banned substances for three years.

"When I talked informally with Alex the night before," Gammons said, "I got the impression he was going to say whatever he tested positive for in 2003 was related to prescription drugs he had taken for a back injury in spring training."

People also busted on Gammons for not defending fellow journalist Selena Roberts from A-Rod's spurious attacks that A-Rod later apologized for.

...Gammons said he regrets not challenging Rodriguez when he mounted an attack on Roberts, calling the Sports Illustrated reporter "a stalker" and falsely accusing her of trespassing and trying "to break into my house where my girls are up there sleeping."

"I know Selena and have great respect for her," Gammons said, "and I know a lot of people were offended that I didn't rise up immediately to defend her. It so stunned me, I was sitting there thinking, people at home are going to say, 'Alex, your first answer already validated what she wrote.' But in hindsight, I wish I had said, 'This is not germane here,' and cut it off."

(Via Baseball Musings)

Buzz, Bob, Projectile Spittle and Me

Finally got around to reading this article by Will Leitch (twice in 2 days!) about his experience on Bob Costas' HBO show from 8 months ago. To set the scene, Costas had on Leitch to semi-debate Buzz Bissinger on the amorphous topic "The Internet". Also along for the ride is Cleveland wide receiver Braylon Edwards, though he remains silent for the 2 minute thrashing for which I was able to find video.

I was going to write a couple paragraphs talking about how Unlikely Words doesn't really do a lot of opinionating, and so hopefully Buzz Bissinger will keep us in his RSS reader, but I lost my steam. Sorry about that. I'll try harder tomorrow.

I liked this pull out from Will Leitch's New York Magazine article on Twitter: "the publicity Twitter has generated [is] mostly from nervous journalists striving to stay relevant in a free-information age."

This type of article comes out once in a while and it never makes me feel better. In fact, it makes me want to stop eating anything, ever. I don't want to eat anymore bug parts.

Peanut butter — that culinary cause célèbre — may contain approximately 145 bug parts for an 18-ounce jar; or five or more rodent hairs for that same jar; or more than 125 milligrams of grit.

In case you’re curious: you’re probably ingesting one to two pounds of flies, maggots and mites each year without knowing it, a quantity of insects that clearly does not cut the mustard, even as insects may well be in the mustard.

(Via Boing Boing)

Sort of, retailers are being encouraged to ban bags instead of being required to do so.

"The Law of Large Numbers shows that an event with a low probability of occurrence in a small number of trials has a high probability of occurrence in a large number of trials...Events with a million-to-one odds happen 295 times a day in America."

So you're telling me there's a chance?

(Via Balloon Juice)

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We've come to the 4 PM - 5 PM of season 7. This week we're going to find out who the traitor is. Presumably, we'll also find out why Jack Bauer and Agent Walker are still hot and heavy to go after Dubaku, even though he doesn't seem like a threat. Anyone have any predictions for tonight's show?

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Not sure if this story is from Millhauser's new book, Dangerous Laughter: Thirteen Stories, but I link to it because I took 2 semesters of Fiction Workshop from him and once made him read and critique a story about the toilet paper lobby. Sorry, Professor!