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Dodgers touch Colon for run in fourth

An unfortunate and eminently avoidable headline makes me giggle. I’m such a child. And you are too.

More Political Baseball Cards - Al Gore and George Bush Together Again

Following up on a post from last week, there is news that Upper Deck will be making a couple cards featuring candidates for president. They actually look pretty funny. Bush and Gore are on a card showing Knoblach missing the tag on Offerman during the playoffs.

Rudy Giuliani Loves the Red Sox Says Topps

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I know, I know. I already posted a sports/politics post today, but I just couldn’t resist this. In response to Rudy Giuliani’s sports bigamy regarding his support for the Red Sox in the World Series, Topps is going to make some baseball cards that feature Rudy celebrating with the Sox after their World Series win.

(Via Bostonist (via Gothamist))

Why Does a Senator Care About the NFL?

Arlen Specter wants to know more about the Patriots taping of sideline signals. He made noise about it the week before the Superbowl in a moved that could have been timed only to embarrass the NFL. He wants to hold hearings. IN THE SENATE. I’d explain all the times that his oversight could have come in useful in the past 7-9 years, but it wouldn’t be news to you anyway.

Do you suppose it could have anything to do with the fact that Specter’s #1 and #2 campaign donors are Comcast’s lobbying firm and Comcast? Comcast has been in a protracted battle with the NFL regarding their NFL Network. Maybe Specter thought he could stick up for his beloved Iggles while sticking it to the NFL in the process.
Thanks, again, for nothing, Arlen.

Slumpbuster!

Ha! Ha ha ha. Ha.

Congrats to the Sox

During the game tonight, a friend and I were discussing who would win if the New England Patriots played the Boston Red Sox? Hard to say.

I just saw Theo getting interviewed on the field. The interviewer said, and I’m paraphrasing, “Theo, you just watched the team win the 2nd world series on your watch. I know you don’t want to stroke yourself here, but how does it feel.” Theo said, “Haha. That comes later, huh?”
Channel 7, 1 AM. Wow.

ALCS Game 5

Top 1:
Ugh. Nice start, Pedroia.

Yoooooooooooooooooooooouk! Momentum? Is this it?

Guess not. Thanks, Papi.

“Keys to the game for the Red Sox: it’s win or see you in Fort Myers. That’s their spring training facility.” Don’t explain your “jokes,” McCarver.

McCarver’s unhappy that no one’s going to throw at Manny for admiring his homer. I kinda want to see him throw his hands in the air on second base right now, as he’s just tied Pete Rose’s LCS hitting streak. Anyone want to mention that? Tim? Joe? No? Ok, that’s cool.

Oh. My. God. I kind of want to die now. Was Manny running slow? Or was that just a good throw? Not an auspicious start. Somehow it doesn’t feel like we’re up 1-0.

Bottom 1:
Casey Blake is considerably more entertaining reading the lineup than Kielty was. Nicknames! G-Size! Scroobs! T-Pronk!

This double by G-Size does not bode well. Three guys run for the ball, no one catches it, and one of them kicks it into foul territory. Oh, good, and a base hit for Scroobs.

Double-play! But the game is tied. Seems like a good trade at this point, especially if Beckett’s going to give up another hit. Oh, look at that.

Strikes out Garko to end the inning. Nice! Now, if only Fox would stop playing the theme to the damn Drew Carey show.

I have some questions about the Taco Bell Nachos Bel Grande commercial. Presumably the younger brother was visiting the older brother at the latter’s home; doesn’t it seem unlikely that little brother wouldn’t have ever met his brother’s girlfriend? And if he had never met the girlfriend, mightn’t she take some notice of the newcomer when she brought the dog in? I’m having trouble with the whole scene. Kinda want nachos now, though.

Top 2:
OK, Bobby Kielty. Your job here is to be better than J. D. Drew. Can you do it? No. You can’t. (In fairness, the ball looked inside to me, too.)

This would be a good time for Coco to come up big. Come up big, Coco!

God damn you, Coco. Aaaaand a pop-up from Lugo. 6-9 are really just not showing up for this series, are they.

Oh! Hi, Dane Cook! I tell ya, I can’t wait for the second October this year—oh. Just the one?

Bottom 2:
I’m amused that Joe Buck described Gutierrez’s flailing hack at a 3-1 pitch well out of the strike zone as, “Chased it a bit.”

Top 3:
Rachel’s calling a lead-off double for Pedroia. I like that kind of optimism. According to Ken Rosenthal, Pedroia has defiantly claimed that he’s “swinging the bat good.” It’s “well,” Dustin. You’ve been swinging the bat “well.” Which you haven’t.

You know what, I apologize, Dustin. Nice single. Of course, Youkilis hits into a double play. I think the Fox producers lost track of how many outs there were, and started playing the “end of inning” music. Ha.

Big Papi walks, and here comes Manny. What the hell happened on that one? Ortiz scored, but did that ball go out? McCarver is in disbelief, and confused about physics—but no, that ball was gone. This call by the umpires is bullshit. I don’t understand why McCarver and Bank are focusing on the carom. The ball was over the yellow line. In fairness, McCarver is right that Manny needs to run out of the box on hits like this. Shameful base-running in an elimination game.

Lowell strikes out, and that’s all we get.

Bottom 3:
OK, we’re back. It’s possible that I was wrong about Manny’s ball being out of the ballpark.

Strikeout, and a nice play by Pedroia for an exciting 4-3. Beckett’s fifth K, and Boston’s still up 2-1.

Top 4:
Two on with nobody out! True, Coco and Lugo are not the two guys we want coming up right now, but I still don’t like Coco bunting here. Why give up the out? Also, he seems to suck at it. If Tito doesn’t replace Coco with Ellsbury before the end of this game, I’ll whine about it. Right here. On this very blog. Just you wait.

Julio, you’re killing me.

Bottom 4:
That was quick. Nice!

Top 5:
Two quick outs from Pedroia and Youk, and then Papi singles to the opposite field, which I love. Then bases loaded, and nuffink. Which I don’t love, so much.

Bottom 5:
Tim McCarver: baseball player, sportscaster, rock and roll aficionado. Shut up, McCarver. And sit down, Kenny Lofton. Don’t start nothin’.

Oh, look, it’s the Bad News Bears in the infield! Why the hell was Lugo even going for that ball?

Ah, just put your trust in Beckett. Strike three, Scroobs.

Top 6:
You know, I love “Sounds of the Game” and I really enjoyed Gary Cederstrom’s brawl-avoidance. “Josh, not a word. Not a word, dude.” I think it’s awesome Cederstrom calls Beckett “dude.”

Oh, were Varitek, Crisp, and Lugo batting?

Bottom 6:
What is there to say? Beckett is undisputedly the man.

Top 7:
The montage starting this inning was unnecessarily treacly, I think. Pedroia’s gapper, however, works for me. 2B!

Yoooouk!!!111! Gotta love a run-scoring triple that knocks out Sebathia. Well done, Sweatiest Man In Baseball.

Hey, you know what? I am officially sick of the Miller High Life commercials.

Ortizzle with a sac fly RBI! I’m staring to unclench a little about this game.

Bottom 7:
Holy crap, with one out in the seventh, Beckett just threw his 86th pitch. That’s… not a lot of pitches. Of course, on the 87th, Lofton reaches on an E1.

Called third strike! My favorite way to end an inning. (I guess.)

Top 8:
Welcome to the game, J. D. Drew! A lead off walk is not the worst you could do. (By the way, Fox, I wouldn’t mind a camera permanently focused on the Red Sox bullpen. The Lester/Delcarmen drum corp is cracking me up.)

Wow. E1, everybody’ s safe! And then a bunt for a base hit by Lugo loads the bases! This is shaping up to be the kind of exciting inning where the Red Sox catch a couple of breaks and then piss it all away.

Hey, a passed ball! 5-1! And a walk to re-load the bases for Youk! Look at how excited I am! Count the exclamation marks!

Mastny walks in a run, and now the bases are loaded for Big Papi. This is starting to feel awesome. Eh, RBI sac fly. Kinda disappointed, actually.

OK, so here’s a question. If Beckett comes out for the 8th at 96 pitches with a 5+ run lead, is that a pretty clear sign that Tito’s lost faith in the bullpen? Also, McCarver seems to think that “mantra” means “philosophy.” (Beckett won’t come back on short rest to pitch game 7 because that’s not Boston’s “mantra.”)

Bottom 8:
OK, Beckett does start the 8th, but Jeemer and the Bot are warming. Let’s hope Francona’s got his walking shoes on if things start to get hairy. Rachel and I agree, however, that taking him out and keeping his arm available for emergency relief in Game 7, would have been the better call.

Hey, that worked out!

Top 9:
Bill Simmons neatly summed up J. D. Drew’s schtick of getting a nice looking base-hit when it doesn’t matter, such as, for instance, leading off the ninth when you’re leading by 6.

Bottom 9:
First and third, but I’m not worried.

Rock. Beckett + Papelbon = bring on game 6.

Matt Clement?

It’s about to get a little arcane, so if you don’t care the slightest for rules governing playoff rosters, you might want to skip to the next post…

Newspapers have been reporting off and on all year about the progress of Matt Clement as he rehabilitates after shoulder surgery at the end of last season. His comeback has been advancing smoothly and he’s actually ahead of schedule, pitching in a simulated game this afternoon. But the chance of him pitching for the Sox again this year (and possibly ever again) is minuscule because of a technicality in the rule governing a team’s playoff rosters. Any player not on the 25 man active roster as of August 31st is not eligible to be made active for the playoff roster. Teams are granted an exemption for players on the DL on August 31st which allows them to interchange the “injured” player for a healthy one (Think Jacoby Ellsbury this year, and, well, Mike Greenwell in 1986). Matt Clement isn’t the only player on the DL at this point, but it’s very unlikely that Theo would sacrifice any possible roster flexibility for the playoffs in order to get Matt Clement a start unless he was certain Clement would be lights out.

Unlikely Words Author Featured on ESPN.com

I took issue with the pre-season power rankings on Hashmarks by Matt Mosley and he addresses my complaints in his column.

Some reaction from other fans: “The above post is the stupist thing I have heard” and “Best Fan Email ever.”

I have to say I’m pretty psyched to have my words featured on ESPN.com, it’s not the Sportsguy, but it’s close.

Baseball music

This list of entrance music for baseball players shows me that 1) baseball players aren’t very original and 2) baseball players don’t have very good taste. I guess I shouldn’t judge.

I was going to go through and pick a couple to point out, but there’s too much ridiculousness going on. Needless to say, many pitchers consider themselves “The Jungle” and enjoy welcoming hitters to themselves.

756

I almost always agree with King Kaufman’s take on baseball, so I thought I’d quote this bit from his column after Barry Bonds’s record-breaking home run:

I’ve been thinking and writing for a while now that Bonds is getting a little bit of a raw deal, that he’s become the scapegoat for a whole era of drug abuse and cheating, that to dismiss his achievements as steroid- and human growth hormone-fueled is overly simplistic because we don’t know what effect drugs have on baseball performance and we don’t know which players and which pitchers were on the juice when.

But that doesn’t mean I — a home fan, after all — can enjoy this moment any more than most anybody else. I believe Bonds’ record is legitimate, that he really did hit all those home runs, that a lot of our reaction as a society to the steroid mess is in-the-moment hysteria — why aren’t we equally upset about amphetamines?

And Bonds’ record still feels somehow unreal to me. I’ve got an asterisk going.

Bonds probably deserves all of the doubt and controversy around the home run chase; it certainly looks like he took steroids. But I can’t help but think that a big part of the anti-Bonds sentiment comes from the fact that he’s a (black) athlete with a bad attitude who hates to talk to the media. 756 home runs is an accomplishment, in some sense, no matter how he got there, and it’s a real shame for baseball that here we have a magical number that doesn’t quite seem as magic as the ones that came before it. (And this number isn’t unique in that. Quick, without looking it up, what’s the current single-season home run record?)

Of course, in seven years, this whole thing will be moot when A-Rod hits his 780th.

Bonds: Cheater?

And no, I’m not talking about his alleged steroid use. I’m talking about his elbow armor:

For years, sportswriters remarked that his massive “protective” gear – unequaled in all of baseball — permits Bonds to lean over the plate without fear of being hit by a pitch. Thus situated, Bonds can handle the outside pitch (where most pitchers live) unusually well. This is unfair advantage enough, but no longer controversial. However, it is only one of at least seven (largely unexplored) advantages conferred by the apparatus.

Interesting, no? I’d never really thought about competitive advantages conveyed by players’ protective equipment.

(Thanks to Gaijin Biker in comments at Unfogged.)

House Style

Check out this paragraph from an article about how much the Yankees suck:

“The National League game is more an attack-mode game; our league is more stationary softball,” said Alex Rodriguez, although A.L. teams, on average, steal more bases than N.L. teams. “I’m not sure if everybody runs like that, but they ran pretty freely.”

I was struck by the rather straightforward presentation of the facts, in contradiction to the quote. If newspapers reported sports news the way they reported political news, might not it have looked more like this?

“The National League game is more an attack-mode game; our league is more stationary softball,” said Alex Rodriguez. “I’m not sure if everybody runs like that, but they ran pretty freely.” Some N.L. managers argue that A.L. teams, on average, steal more bases than N.L. teams.

I guess it’s nice to see an acknowledgment of objective reality somewhere.

Welcome to Our World, Nicholas Hagadone

And with the 55th pick in the 2007 Amateur Draft, the Boston Red Sox select University of Washington LHP Nicholas Hagadone.

“After spending last year starting behind Tim Lincecum, Hagadone became Washington’s Friday night starter to begin the year. he was moved to the bullpen after two starts because of team need and has been outstanding for the Huskies, showing the ability to save games and pitch multiple innings. With a chance to have a good three-pitch mix, some teams may want to move him back into a rotation once drafted, but worst-case, they’d have a pretty good lefty setup man on their hands.”

What do you guys think about the pick? Crickets…

Here’s an article, talking about one of the main reasons some teams may not always pick the player with the most potential.

In other news, I may be responsible for breaking up Curt Schilling’s no hitter with two outs in the ninth. I wondered over to a co-worker’s cube who was watching on MLBTV and as soon as I got there, the no hitter was toast. Sorry about that, Curt.

Bloooooooooog

In baseball news today, Kevin Youkilis becomes the second Red Sox player with a blog. So far he’s mostly focused on the “who’s faster” feud with Dustin Pedroia, but I’m holding out hope for the future.

Via King Kaufman I see that Norris Hopper has confessed to cheating by rolling the ball into the glove of an unconscious Ryan Freel — the very same Ryan Freel who is doing my fantasy team no good at all by being in a hospital. Wuss.

King’s thoughts on Barry Bonds are worth reading, too.

Wade Boggs: Big Time Drinker?

It says here that Wade Boggs regularly consumed 50-60 beers on cross country road trips. That’s during the trip from the East Coast to the West Coast, mind you, not during the entire trip. It seems a little hard to believe, but maybe it was around 20. I’d heard the Spring Training stories about Wade pulling up to the park and getting out of his trucks with empty beer cans clanging to the ground when he opened the door. Also, he ate fried chicken before every game, which I can’t really argue against.

Those Inscrutable Japanese!

Hey, Jeff Horrigan… do you think it’s possible you’re generalizing from either a too-small sample size, or some kind of ethnic stereotype?

Constantly stoic and seemingly capable of deploying impenetrable tunnel vision to block out the countless potential distractions that come with each and every movement, the last thing one expects from Daisuke Matsuzaka is an inability to handle rare bouts of adversity.

It’s the dude’s third start. I think it’s a little early for the samurai warrior crap.

Opening Day

Well, that was unpleasant.

I’m going to chalk the whole thing up to opening day jitters. Youk and Ortiz looked good, as did Donnelly, Romero, and (after the HR) Okajima.

In fantasy baseball news, the league I’m in with AC is going to be a bruising one for me. Baldelli, Markakis, and Burrell are my starting outfield, and that’s not exactly striking fear into anyone’s heart. My league at work looks much better, but that might just be because I always feel better for having drafted Big Papi.

I tried…

I tried not to post this article about Manny Ramirez from the Onion, but I couldn’t help it.