Both of these moves were awful, and I’m offended Marvel hasn’t put any effort into their best character. Also, I don’t think having these movies made means they can’t; there could always be a Hulk-style do over. War Zone was better, and I have no idea what John Travolta or Dominic West were doing near either of these projects.

Steve Carell shouldn’t make movies like this because they’re bad and they tarnish his image. I think I remember laughing, but not very much and not very hard. It couldn’t have been much worse.

This probably could have been worse if everyone had really tried harder. I didn’t see most of it as I was too busy shaking my head in disgusted anger. However, the face melting scene in Raiders of the Lost Ark remains the most terrifying movie scene of my childhood and no embarrassing threequel can change that.

I don’t know what’s happened to M. Night Shyamalan, but The Happening was an awful, awful, awful, awful, awful (5 awfuls!!!) movie. Bad acting, bad writing, just bad. I’d give this movie 0 stars if it wouldn’t look like I had forgotten to rate it.

What a waste. 21 was super campy in horrible ways. I loved the book and wanted this movie to be great, and it could have been, it just wasn’t.

Reservation Road causes me to introduce a new tag, “When good actors go bad”, to describe the result of good actors in a shit ass movie. Don’t see this, ever, for any reason.

Folks, I watch shitty movies like Eurotrip so you don’t have to. And, in fact, in a tribute to it’s eminant forgetability, I realized half-way through that I had watched most of it already. (I’m too embarrassed to say that when I say “most of it”, I mean all of it. :( .)

Apparently Snakes on a Plane came about at a Hollywood Happy Hour when people were trying to come up with the worst movie pitch ever. It’s clear why this movie won. Bumped from 1 star to 2 stars in admiration of the way the filmmakers unabashedly and repeatedly allowed snakes to kill people by having the snakes clamp down on a human appendage.

(Bonus: This video played during the closing credits and I bet you can’t watching it without wondering if it’s a satire.)

I spent more time thinking about what was wrong with The Last Kiss than any 1 star movie deserves. Everything that I like about Zach Braff on Scrubs made him borderline unwatchable for the first 25 minutes of this movie and we almost shut it off before the middle section was buoyed by good dialogue. However, the movie was not to be redeemed as the ending sucked as bad as the beginning.

Dude, what happened to this feature?

I got busy, okay? I kept meaning to do it, and– and– shut up.

Julie Sokolow–”Seasons”, from IndieFeed. “Spare?” Sure, but there’s “spare” and then there’s “boring.” This is boring. [1 star]

The Moore Brothers–”The Puppet”, from IndieFeed. Quirky, I suppose. It’s definitely quirky. It’s just not particularly, like, good. It’s not bad, either. It’s just not recommendable. [2 stars]

Warm In The Wake–”Tame Thoughts”, from IndieFeed. Finally, my head is moving back and forth while listening to one of these. It’s well-written, it’s catchy. “Acoustic, cosmic folk?” Sure. [3 stars]

I’m easing back into this; can you tell?